Saturday 16 November 2013

It's how you handle the hard times that count.

I know the mantra of "NoExcuses" and I know this does not apply to this situation... although in some ways it still does.

On Tuesday last week my father passed away somewhat suddenly although he had been unwell for a time. I am sad at his passing but also did not want to see him suffer and so am also fairly at peace at the moment with his death.

I have wonderful memories of him and my family have been overwhelmed at the support and genuine shock from so much of the community.

As a way of letting go just a little but also cementing many of the wonderful memories I have let me share a little of what I knew of my father.



He was a very fit may. State level WAFL footballer who trained with Fitzroy in Melbourne when he lived there. He stayed active most of his life, drank a little at times but not much and not often. He and my mother loved the garden and they grew almost everything or had a go at it. They lived on a steep hill with an orchard. Fruit season bought with it apricots, peaches, nectarines, plums, figs, raspberries, strawberries, boysenberries, red currents, pomegranates, pears, apples, oranges and lemons. I call the lettuce on the property feral lettuce (although its a green curly leaf variety) and the asparagus was eaten straight from the ground (tastes great raw if it's fresh). all grown as organically as they could. To name all the vegies would take too long. All the time he stayed fit by walking up and down the 1 in 3 gradient from the house to the garden and the road and back.

I firmly believe it is this fitness that meant the end was sudden, he was still active a month ago but his heart was failing (common trait of our family). Fitness doesn't kill you - it gives you more quality years with your loved ones than you genetics would normally allow. He had outlived his father twice and his grandfather nearly 3 times.

My father also was a giver. I would say he had the courage to lead a generous life. That is all it takes to be generous the willingness to take the risk. After all giving to parts of the community all you risk is your time. We are still trying to collate his life but he has been helping other all his life. From youth hostel in it's early days, football clubs, athletic clubs, Apex, bush fire brigade (member since 1975) and then in late life so much work with landcare and bush care.

2 years ago he was told he had won a citizen  of the year award for the City of Armadale where he lived. He thought it might be the senior of the year award or perhaps the environmental award. If fact it was both.

So Exercise for me has been less than ideal this week... I think I have a bit of an excuse, but diet has been OK. There is so much lovely food here but fortunately it's healthy and healthy choices are often easier.

Next week is his funeral so I suspect it is going to be a tough week but he had quite a sense of humour and as he didn't talk to us about his wished for the service we are trying to make it relevant to him. An ex-senator is leading the service (family friend who is honoured to be asked) and a local elder is doing a welcome to country and then we are playing a song selected by his 8 year old granddaughter - she found an appropriate piece by one direction. Not sure too many 73 years old men have one direction played at their funeral, but he was unconventional in so many ways.

I only hope when my time here is done on earth I can have people look back at my life with such fond memories and admiration for the things I have done to make the world a better place.

1 comment:

  1. Oh Meeghan, so sorry to hear of your dads passing. Hope the funeral can be a time where you are able to celebrate the life he had, and the dad that he was. Thinking of you during this sad time. xxx

    ReplyDelete